I stopped in a little convenience store the other day for a soda and I couldn't help but notice that everywhere I looked, there seemed to be a warning signs posted!
I went away thinking that this poor little business owner must have had a REALLY long string of REALLY BAD days! Every time someone has done something to upset him, he has made a policy to punish all future customers... FOREVER!
And here's the deal...what business owner can honestly say they haven't been in this guy's shoes? Because let's face it, when someone does you wrong, it IS SO tempting to make a GREAT BIG policy that supposedly will prevent you from ever being done wrong again.
For me, it brings to mind the woman who bought 5 patterns by credit card over the phone. Over three months after the transaction, I was notified by her credit cad company that she was disputing the purchase. So I dug out my receipt and called her and she said that she did in fact remember receiving the patterns and honestly seemed horrified about the dispute. She then explained that while she was ill, her husband assumed the bill-paying duties and that he was the one who initiated the dispute. She promised to send me a check for the patterns... but that was over two years ago, and needless to say, it looks like that check will never come....
Or how about when the time I found out that there was a person actually SELLING one of my FREE patterns out on eBay...
Or the time one of my absolutely favorite sample bags was stolen at a trunk show in Louisiana...
I can certainly attest to how hard it is at times like these to step back, remember the BIG picture, and RESIST that primal, simplistic, angry and reactionary urge to punish EVERYONE for the actions of one dishonest, and thoughtless person.
Because you gotta know that when these bad things happened, my gut reaction was to quit sending out trunk shows, pull all of the free patterns off of my website, and refuse to accept credit card orders over the phone.
Because in the heat of that moment you're angry, and focusing only on that one awful person who did you wrong. Your thinking is clouded and your self-preservation instincts take over. In short, this is an absolutely HORRIBLE time to make a new policy.
So what should you do?
Well, it seems to me that you can really only have two choices:
1) you can become bitter and paranoid like that poor little convenience store owner, or...
2) you can find a way to shrug it off... to let it go, at least for a couple of days until you can cool off, and think clearly and rationally about what happened.
Remind Yourself that;
Resist the urge to punish everyone for one person's mistake.
Your thoughts? Please leave a reply.
- WE RESERVE THE RIGHT TO REFUSE SERVICE TO ANYONE FOR ANY REASON!
- ALL ORDERS ARE FINAL! ABSOLUTELY NO REFUNDS!
- NO LOITERING!
- RESTROOMS ARE FOR CUSTOMERS ONLY!
- ABSOLUTELY NO SMOKING ON THESE PREMISES
- ALL VIOLATORS WILL BE PROSECUTED TO THE FULLEST EXTENT OF THE LAW
- NO SHOES, NO SHIRT, NO SERVICE
- WE DO NOT TOLERATE PROFANITY OF ANY TYPE
- THIS IS A CASH-ONLY BUSINESS
- NO CREDIT OR DEBIT CARDS, FOOD STAMPS OR PERSONAL CHECKS
I went away thinking that this poor little business owner must have had a REALLY long string of REALLY BAD days! Every time someone has done something to upset him, he has made a policy to punish all future customers... FOREVER!And here's the deal...what business owner can honestly say they haven't been in this guy's shoes? Because let's face it, when someone does you wrong, it IS SO tempting to make a GREAT BIG policy that supposedly will prevent you from ever being done wrong again.
For me, it brings to mind the woman who bought 5 patterns by credit card over the phone. Over three months after the transaction, I was notified by her credit cad company that she was disputing the purchase. So I dug out my receipt and called her and she said that she did in fact remember receiving the patterns and honestly seemed horrified about the dispute. She then explained that while she was ill, her husband assumed the bill-paying duties and that he was the one who initiated the dispute. She promised to send me a check for the patterns... but that was over two years ago, and needless to say, it looks like that check will never come....
Or how about when the time I found out that there was a person actually SELLING one of my FREE patterns out on eBay...
I can certainly attest to how hard it is at times like these to step back, remember the BIG picture, and RESIST that primal, simplistic, angry and reactionary urge to punish EVERYONE for the actions of one dishonest, and thoughtless person.
Because you gotta know that when these bad things happened, my gut reaction was to quit sending out trunk shows, pull all of the free patterns off of my website, and refuse to accept credit card orders over the phone.
Because in the heat of that moment you're angry, and focusing only on that one awful person who did you wrong. Your thinking is clouded and your self-preservation instincts take over. In short, this is an absolutely HORRIBLE time to make a new policy.
Well, it seems to me that you can really only have two choices:
1) you can become bitter and paranoid like that poor little convenience store owner, or...
2) you can find a way to shrug it off... to let it go, at least for a couple of days until you can cool off, and think clearly and rationally about what happened.
Remind Yourself that;
- Even though one customer did you wrong, there were 5000+ others that did not.
- You're so fortunate to own your own business. Life is good.
- You can't prevent ALL bad things from happening. No matter how many policies you institute, there will always be a despicable person who finds a way to do you wrong.
Resist the urge to punish everyone for one person's mistake.
Your thoughts? Please leave a reply.
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You have a good head on your shoulders and a great attitude.
ReplyDeleteYou are right on the money with your advice! You can't avoid an occasional bad customer. I just consider them great fodder for stories. The vast majority of people are nice, appreciative and honest. I focus on those.
ReplyDeleteGreat, great post. I really enjoy your blog because you focus on the positive things in life. Hmm, maybe I need to do that more!! Have a great time at Fall Market.
ReplyDeleteThanks a bunch for the nice feedback. I can't imagine becoming that embittered little old man!
ReplyDelete:)
I see a man who is doing business on HIS terms. He might not want a lot of headaches and is avoiding them before they happen. I had a homebased business for 12 yrs and I had a lot of wonderful customers, but I had a few that made me think twice about staying open. I just learned some coping skills. Coping with my own feelings and reactions and coping with customers that I would not welcome back. One of my own neighbors wrote me a bad check ($150). When I called to tell her, she said, "oh, that just kills my day!". I said in a light tone, "what do you think it did to mine?"! We came up with a 2 month pay back plan and I never took a check from her again. A bride's mother stopped payment on a check for 5 bridesmaids' dresses because she didn't like the way the fabric draped (that she bought). I held the 5th dress for ransom until the lady brought me cash...the day of the wedding. Having a business is a wonderful experience and it teaches you alot about people.
ReplyDeleteBeckie
Great post! I have to say that I laughed when I saw the sign about trespassing - too funny. Unfortunately people come with all sorts of different dispositions and the rest of us have to learn to just deal with each one as they come.
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed reading your commentary. True, when bad things happen sometimes many people suffer for it. We need to trust that the majority of people are honest. Remember, all those dishonest people will have to answer to a higher power some day.
ReplyDeleteI have several of your patterns and especially like the purse insert, although I do not change purses very often.
Keep up the dreaming, all of us avid sewers anticipate your next project.
Regards, Sandra J
Thank you! This post is a breath of fresh air! The ridiculous signs yell at rule-followers. Their intended audience either don't care or are oblivious, either way, they don't work. In the workplace, these translate to yelling memos that cause lower morale, productivity-sucking grumbling, and general malaise. A worker has to be pretty strong and determined to overcome this negativity. Wish I could pass this up the chain.
ReplyDeleteI so-o-o love your outlook on life! This will not be the 1st time that I print a copy of your wise comments and tuck them in my little "things to read when I'm having a bad day" folder!
ReplyDeleteI agree wholeheartedly. I'd rather spend my time and my attention on the things that work and please me. And I think I'd prefer to welcome what works and the kind and wonderful people in my life with open arms rather than curl up in a prickly ball to avoid the occasional bump from someone less pleasant. Contrary to what the TV and newspapers would have us believe, there are countless more good deeds than bad performed in a day. And honest, kind people far outnumber their counterparts.
ReplyDeleteHave a pleasant and positive experience at the quilt market. I'm waiting almost patiently for some hint about your new design.
I know how that feels when someone cheats you out of hard earned money. As a hairstylist a new client came in and wanted the works. Which totaled around 95.00. She was over the moon with the results of my service. Happily wrote me a check with a 5.00 tip........and took off her necklace and gave it to me. Little did I know the necklace was my payment. From that time on I only excepted cash, and checks only from the customers that I'd had for years, even then there was a bitter taste in my mouth about checks.
ReplyDeleteVery interesting that you wrote about this today. This morning, I had a discussion with my granddaughter on working with the public; her girl scout troop will do gift wrapping for Barnes & Nobles. I told her that not everyone will be pleasant, but to let it go. The customer could have had a bad day, be in pain or just be difficult. The majority of the people will be very nice. No matter what, she is to be polite and pleasant. There always seems to be those that are out to scam, steal or whatever. You can choose to react positively or negatively. You have chosen the right road, the high road. BTW, I am not condoning the person who took your free pattern and tried to sell it as theirs.----Denise Stahl
ReplyDeleteI think you have an awesome attitude! That's one reason you're still in business and doing well.
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing the comments.
ReplyDeleteHad lots of flak about the free designs I used to offer. The folks who would BUY from me never seemed to be the ones :)
Thank you for having the courage to write. Enjoy market!
Sew on,
Jane
Somehow how I just knew you guys were the types to agree with this Line of thinking. I'm SO glad you do!
ReplyDelete:)